“Sustenance, Clothing and Marital Relations”

At the time of the wedding, the husband obligates himself to provide his wife with three things: “sustenance, garments and marital relations.”1

Similar to all Torah matters that are extremely precise and replete with consequence and import, here, too, these three obligations result from the intrinsic connection of husband and wife, as explained in Kabbalah and Chassidus.2

Thus the Rebbe writes:3 “‘Sustenance’ refers to the effluence that is drawn down [and internalized] within the ‘vessel’ of the recipient; ‘garment’ — which encompasses the person — is analogous to the encompassing level that transcends the spiritual energy that is capable of being internalized within the ‘vessel’; ‘marital relations’ — an even loftier encompassing level that is even higher than the transcendent level of garment ... drawing down the essence ... that is acquired without a garment.”

To clarify further:


“Sustenance” Represents the Body

“Sustenance” refers to the food that the husband is obligated to provide his wife:

Food enters the person’s body, is digested, and then transformed into the person’s flesh and blood. This is an expression of the material connection between husband and wife, as together they build the material aspects of their lives.


“Garment” Represents the Soul

“Garments” refer to the clothing the husband is obligated to provide his wife:

A garment encompasses the individual [and does not enter him, as does food]. This expresses the higher connection between husband and wife, their soul connection.

Just as a physical garment encircles the body, so too spiritually, the garment is the encompassing level that transcends the body and physicality. It thus expresses the loftier and transcendent spiritual connection of husband and wife: their soul connection.


“Marital Relations” Represents Body and Soul

“Marital relations” refers to the intimate relations between husband and wife.

On this most supreme level, body and soul merge into one; in addition to the physical intimacy engendered by marital relations, there is also the spiritual intimacy of the soul. For as will be explained at length [in Volume II] in the section entitled “Be Fruitful and Multiply,” the ability to bear children (a result of the intimacy of marital relations) is a most lofty spiritual power that is connected to the soul.

We thus observe that the three obligations of the husband to his wife reflect the essential connection of husband and wife:

Food, representing the body; clothing, the soul; and marital relations, a merging of the two.