G‑d and the Jewish People — Husband and Wife

The text of the betrothal blessing reads, “He Who sanctifies His nation, Israel, through chuppah and kiddushin.” In other words, G‑d is considered the “husband,” the Jewish people are considered His “wife,” and G‑d betrothed the Jewish people.

This betrothal took place during the festival of Shavuos, when G‑d gave us the Torah on Mt. Sinai, as the Midrash states1 in its comment on the verse,2 “I shall betroth you for all time.” So, too, the Gemara states:3 “‘On His wedding day’ — this refers to Matan Torah, the day on which G‑d gave us the Torah.”

Additionally, the prevailing wedding customs derive from G‑d’s marriage with the Jewish people. As the Tashbetz writes:4 “Bear the following principle in mind — we derive all the customs of groom and bride from Matan Torah, where G‑d appeared as a groom before the Jewish people, the bride.”


Wedding Customs at Matan Torah

Examples of these customs are:

a) The chuppah, the marriage canopy. G‑d spread a chuppah over the Jewish people, as the Gemara states:5 “G‑d forcefully spread the mountain over them,” i.e., the mountain acted as a chuppah.6

b) Kiddushin. The mitzvos that the Jewish people received at Matan Torah were the kiddushin, as we say in the text of the blessings we recite prior to performing mitzvos, “He sanctified us, [in Hebrew, kideshanu,] with His commandments” — kideshanu deriving from the term kiddushin.7

c) Marital relations and intimacy. The Jewish people unite and cleave to G‑d through their performance of mitzvos, for the term “mitzvah” denotes “union and attachment” between man — who performs the mitzvos — and G‑d, the Commander of the mitzvos.

This is why at every wedding we say, “He Who sanctifies His nation, Israel,” remembering the wedding of G‑d and the Jewish people in order to instruct us that it is from this wedding that we learn the laws and customs of a wedding.


Becoming One Entity

Not only is the format of the betrothal, but the very essence of the bond realized between husband and wife essentially akin to (and rooted in) the bond between G‑d and the Jewish people.

Forming a bond and union between two entities can be achieved in one of two ways:

a) Even after the two parts connect, one can still tell that they are two distinct parts, even though they cleave to each other.

b) The connection between them is truly absolute. They become truly one and it is impossible to recognize and discern that they were originally divided.

The union and attachment of G‑d with the Jewish people is of the most complete manner (i.e., the second manner of connection): Jews cleave to G‑d in a manner in which they truly become one, as the Zohar states:8 “Israel and G‑d are truly one,” i.e., Jews cleave and attach themselves to G‑d in such a way that they become wholly one with Him. This is so because the Divine soul of every Jew is “truly a part of G‑d above,”9 for which reason they actually are one.


“He Sanctifies His Nation, Israel,
Through Chuppah and Kiddushin”

The same is true with regard to the connection between husband and wife — that there exist two forms of connection between them:

a) The first is the physical aspect of marriage, where even after their marriage, husband and wife are not one but two distinct personas, merely cleaving to, and loving each other.

b) The spiritual and soul aspect of marriage, where the souls of husband and wife reunite through marriage and revert to their original state — one soul — as the Zohar states: “They become one.”

This, then, is the substance of the blessing, “He sanctifies His nation, Israel, through chuppah and kiddushin”: Bride and groom are blessed that their wedding be similar to the wedding of G‑d and the Jewish people. Just as G‑d and the Jews were utterly united at Matan Torah, we pray and bless the couple that they build a home in which both feel that they are truly united and one as a result of their one soul. When this occurs, the glue that binds them will be mighty, perfect and complete, leading to an eternal edifice for many long and happy days and years.

The verse, “You who cleave to G‑d are all truly alive today,”10 refers to the newlywed couple who cleave to G‑d by feeling and “living” with this true feeling of cleaving and unity as a result of the cleaving and unity of their one soul. They then merit that “you ... are all truly alive today.”